


The Light Of A Hundred Million Stars

by ddaengit



Category: Hundred Million Stars From The Sky - Fandom, Sora Kara Furu Ichioku No Hoshi - Fandom, The Smile Has Left Your Eyes (2018)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Fluff, Hundred Million Stars From The Sky, Hurt/Comfort, Jin Gook is trying his best, Light Angst, No One Dies This Time, No one will read this but oh well, Other, Post-Canon, Reincarnation, Sora Kara Furu Ichioku no Hoshi, The Smile Has Left Your Eyes, The Smile Has Left Your Eyes Is Underrated, bc I can’t believe the show ended like that??, tbh this is a comfort fic i wrote for myself, this is for all the people out there who are still crying
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-22
Updated: 2019-04-22
Packaged: 2020-01-23 20:51:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,398
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18557626
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ddaengit/pseuds/ddaengit
Summary: Yoo Jin Gook never viewed himself as a superstitious person, but the moment he held his child in his arms, he knew it was Jinkang.Sequel to The Smile Has Left Your Eyes





	The Light Of A Hundred Million Stars

 

Yoo Jin Gook never viewed himself as a superstitious person, but the moment he held his child in his arms, he knew it was Jinkang.

 

Maybe it’s the familiar glow when she first opened her eyes, or maybe it was her smile that tugged at his heartstrings the way Jinkang’s had. Whatever it was, Jin Gook could swear on everything he had that it was her- Jinkang has reincarnated in the form of his first child.

 

That was why he insisted on naming his daughter Jinkang despite Sojung’s protests. That was why he didn’t pay heed to her cries as she begged him to let go of the past, to move on. But she didn’t understand. She may be his wife and the child’s mother, but she didn’t understand Jinkang like he did. He just couldn’t prove with solid evidence that it was Jinkang just yet.

 

“ You’re delusional.” She said one day, voice hoarse from all the pleading and begging that fell on deaf ears. “ This is not Jinkang. This is our child. Our daughter.”

 

He won in the end, though. Even if he came off as a lost cause, or as a depressed man gone mad, Sojung eventually gave in. She, perhaps, in her own way, understood his grief. She had loved Jinkang, after all.

 

So that was how their child’s name came to be: Yoo Jin Kang.

 

He did not miss the odd looks of his colleagues when he announced the name of his child, standing up proudly with his back ramrod straight. _I am happy now,_ he wanted to scream, _can’t you see? Jinkang has come back to me. She is back where she belongs._

 

“ Congratulations, Jin Gook.” His colleagues said, patting his back and piling his desk with gifts without bothering to hide their pity. “ It is a blessing to have a child at your age.”

 

“ Congratulations, sunbae.” Chorong uttered; his tight-lipped smile did not go unnoticed. He gave him a small box containing a pair of baby shoes: delicate knitted things in the lightest shade of daffodil yellow. “ Jinkang…will no doubt grow up to be a beautiful lady.”

 

“ Of course, of course!” Jin Gook chuckled, even if his face feels like it’s about to tear apart. Chorong had loved Jinkang once. She would have been still been alive if she hadn’t fallen for Mooyoung instead. Still alive and breathing and laughing.  
“ You always know what to say, Uhm Chorong!”

 

(Do you love her still? Do you mourn for her like I do?)

 

It wasn’t until the child turned 3 months old that a birthmark started to form on her arm: a spot that slowly darkened with time, settling onto her tender, fair skin like permanent ink. It stretched on the expanse of her skin like Jinkang’s burn did and when that happened, Jin Gook was sure- so sure that he felt the back of his eyes burn with relief and happiness and grief all at once- that if he had any doubts then, he didn’t have any now.

 

“ Jinkang, Jinkang,” He cried softly; cradling her back and forth as he held her light, fragile body in his arms. When she nuzzled her tiny face against his chest, letting out the quietest of murmurs, Jin Gook felt his heart mend and break at the same time. All he knew was that he could finally, _finally_ breathe again.

 

***

 

It was not an unusual sight to see a man and a little girl walking down the streets at evening. The middle-aged couple that dotes on their young daughter has become common knowledge to everyone living in that area, and although it is frowned upon by the older generation to see the child being overly-pampered, Yoo Jin Kang was a ruddy-faced child loved by all, melting even the coldest of hearts with her clever words and toothy grin.

 

“ The child is a godsend.” Some people say, especially those who knew of the incident that happened so many years ago. The child has brought life to the washed-out homicide detective, more than his wife ever did. The religious, nosy ahjummas mutter amongst themselves and whisper that the old couple has been blessed by the Goddess of Luck, while the few who remember the bright advertisement designer and her untimely end shake their heads in pity, knowing all too well who the child was named after.

 

There were other rumours as well – baseless, outrageous ones- but Jin Gook does nothing to stop them and instead pours his attention to young daughter, smiling fondly as she runs ahead of him: her short hair bobbing with each lively step, her yellow dress smudged with dirt and grass from the playground.

 

“ Daddy, look!” She squealed, waving her colourful windmill as it spun with the gentle breeze. She jumped up and down, a budding sunflower anxious to bloom. “Look!”

 

Jin Gook laughs with his whole heart, picking her light body up from the ground to carry her on his broad shoulders. Jin Kang lets out a peal of giggles that fills his hollow chest with warmth.

 

“ You’ve gotten heavier, princess.” He teased, even though she is as weightless as a feather. “One day I won’t be able to carry you anymore.”

 

Jin Kang hums ruefully, before resting her little chin on his head. “ That’s okay. I will still love you.”

 

Jin Gook laughs again, a happy and delightful sound. It was almost like the past never happened. 

 

_Almost._

 

****

 

The first time Yoo Jin Kang ever saw the picture was during spring-cleaning. She had only intended to dust the box, but something about it piqued her curiosity, and before she knew it she has already lifted its lid, giving in to the entice of the stale plastic container.

 

The contents of the box were unexciting, filled with newspaper cuttings and flyers headlined with bold words she did not know how to read. Jinkang quickly lost interest in them, her attention drawn immediately to a picture buried under piles of musty-smelling paper. It was old; yellowing with age and crumpled at the edges. The faces of the people remained clear however: a man and a woman with their arms intertwined, smiling at the camera as they held out peace signs. The grey sky stretched endlessly behind them, and suddenly Jinkang was hit with a wave of nostalgia that prickled her eyes. They looked happy, timeless- as if they’ve found a whole new world in each other’s presence.

 

“ I don’t recall teaching you to pry, Yoo Jin Kang.” Her father’s voice sounded icily. Jin Kang jumped- her father had never spoken to her like that before- but before she could fully turn around to face him, he had already wrenched the picture out of her hands, staring her down with blazing eyes.

 

“ I-” Jin Kang stuttered, her face tingling with embarrassment. Her hands felt cold and empty. “ I’m sorry-”

 

“ What’s wrong?” Her mother said, appearing at the doorway, a pail of water in hand. She looked between Jin Gook and Jin Kang, a frown settling between her brows. “ Did something happen?”

 

Jin Gook tensed, his lips thinning into a pale narrow line. Then a strange expression flitted across his face, a mélange of emotions too deep and profound for young Jin Kang to understand.

 

“ Nothing.” He said briskly, turning away from Jin Kang to face her mother. “ A small misunderstanding, that’s all.”

 

Jin Kang does not miss the hastiness in the way he stuffed the picture in his pocket, nor his sad eyes that spoke of apologies and secrets. But she keeps the burning questions to herself and stays silent. 

 

***

 

“ Hey Jin Kang, how are your grandparents doing?” A boy jeered, laughing obnoxiously as soon as she entered the classroom. Jin Kang rolled her eyes; she was not in the mood to bicker right after recess. “ Still healthy enough to walk, I assume?”

 

“ Shut your mouth, Ilhoon.” Jin Kang muttered, having half a mind to throttle him. 

 

“ Aw, don’t be petty!” He replied, his voice laced with fake sadness. “ I just want to know if the old people are doing okay.”

 

Ever since she started high school, Park Ilhoon had made it his objective to embarrass her in front of the entire school population every single day. While Jin Kang considers herself generally mild-tempered, she has no tolerance when it comes to the pride of her family. She suspects Ilhoon’s sudden hostility towards her stems from the arrest of his older brother, who was caught selling and abusing drugs by Yoo Jin Gook a year back, but that hardly justifies Ilhoon’s actions. It wasn’t her fault that the reputation of the prestigious Park family is now ruined because of her father’s downright refusal to accept bribes.

 

“ First off, they’re my parents.” Jin Kang snapped, rounding on Ilhoon. Her cheeks heated at the weight of her classmates’ stares. “ And second of all, mind your own business.”

 

“ You sure about that?” His face twisted into a contemptuous sneer. “ My father told me your dad got a limp after chasing down a petty thief. Maybe it’s time for the old man to retire-”

 

“ Maybe you should worry about your brother instead.” A voice intercepted coolly, “ I heard he’s struggling with rehabilitation.”

 

The classroom fell dead silent, the air condensing as everyone gaped at Kang Seon Ho, who looked at Ilhoon with a sly smile. Jin Kang knew of Kang Seon Ho, the new student who just transferred to her school a few months ago. His parents had moved from Haesan to Seoul in search of a better life, and have just recently opened a convenience store just a few blocks away from her house. She has seen him around the area before- running errands for his parents on his bicycle, wearing his trademark newsboy cap- and although they’ve never spoken to each other, she had a good impression of him. He was always punctual for class and well mannered, a likeable boy who kept mostly to himself. Jin Kang had even thought of him as too docile, but his challenging gaze on Ilhoon proved her wrong.

 

“ Watch what you say, new kid.” Ilhoon spat, his face growing into a furious red. “Don’t mess with what you don’t know.”

 

“ Funny you should say that when you were commenting about someone else’s private life a moment ago. You know, like an asshole.”

 

Ilhoon stood, pushing his table aggressively as he made his way towards Seonho. Usually the person would’ve blanched, but Seonho only leaned back in his chair, looking up at him with amusement.

 

“ It’s about time you apologize, brat.” Ilhoon hissed, shoving Seonho’s neatly piled books to the floor. “ Apologize and maybe I’ll forgive you.”

 

Seonho glanced down at his fallen books in distaste, before raising his head to scoff.

 

“ You’re pathetic.”

 

The classroom dissolved into pandemonium. Uniforms tumbled heavily to the ground in livid cusses and unforgiving fists, tables and chairs screeched violently against the cemented floor. Jin Kang lurched forward, trying to break them apart with a few other students, but only got scratched in the messy process. It was only when the teachers arrived that they finally stopped- Ilhoon was still swearing at Seonho, who countered with a patronizing smile. Both of them were brought to the disciplinary office, and classes resumed as usual after that. Jin Kang-no matter how hard she tried- found herself unable to pay attention, her gaze subconsciously flitting back to Seonho’s empty seat.

 

After what seemed like hours, Seon Ho eventually returned to class, barely sparing her a glance as he walked back to his seat. A dejected feeling came upon Jin Kang, and she spent the rest of her day trying to catch his gaze, to convey her gratitude for standing up for her, but to no avail. Seonho’s focus never wavered from the whiteboard, and after a couple of failed attempts, Jin Kang made up her mind to approach him after class. The guilt in her chest- though irrational- was starting to become unbearable, and she figured the sooner she gets rid of it, the better.

 

Her courage soon diminishes, however, when Seonho lands his dark eyes on her hesitating form, blinking curiously.

 

“ Uh,” Jin Kang starts, when Seonho makes no move to initiate conversation. She supposed it’s reasonable- she did reach out to him first, after all. “ Hi.”

 

The corners of Seonho’s lips tug up in a somewhat amused smile. Jin Kang hugs her bag closer to her chest to push down the overwhelming embarrassment.

 

“ Hello.” Seonho eventually said. 

 

“ Um. I just want to say thank you. You know, for standing up for me. For what you did back there.”

 

Seonho blinks again before rising up from his chair, slinging his bag strap over his shoulder. “ I wasn’t doing it for you. I just figured I would shut him up because he was being an obnoxious moron.”

 

“ Oh.” Jin Kang said awkwardly; entombing herself in her bedroom suddenly seems very tempting. “ Well. Still. Thank you.”

 

“ Then you’re welcome, I guess.” Seonho snorted, though his upturned lips showed no malice. “ Yoo Jin Kang, right? Your parents work for the police.”

 

“ Yes.” Jin Kang said, surprised. “ How did you know?”

 

Seonho raised his eyebrows sceptically. “ I have ears.”

 

“Alright, smartass.” Jin Kang muttered, then realizing she might’ve been a little too harsh, she added: “ Are you okay?”

 

“ I’m walking, aren’t I?” Seonho said, before motioning to her wounded hand. “What happened to you?”

 

“ This? Got it when I tried to stop you guys fighting. You would think only cats do that, you know.” Jin Kang teased, only to regret it when Seonho’s eyes widened. “I’m fine, though! It’s not like I’ll catch rabies or something.”

 

“ Let me treat you to something, at least.” Seonho said, “ What do you want? There is a tteokbokki store nearby-”

 

“ What? No!” Jin Kang exclaimed, taken aback by his sudden offer. “ It might not be you even. It might’ve been Ilhoon-”

 

“ Then let me walk you home.” Seonho insisted, “ We live in the same area, so it won’t be much of a hassle.”

 

“ I-“

 

“ It would also make me feel better.”

 

Jin Kang found herself walking home together with Seonho that day, and many days after that. It became an unspoken agreement and the seed to their friendship, and very soon he began to walk with her to school in the mornings, sit with her during lunch and choose her as his teammate for every school project.

 

“ Are you and Seonho dating?” Her female friends asked one day, giggling as they spotted Seonho, tall and tan, waving to Jin Kang from afar.

 

“ We’re just best friends.” Jin Kang said, in a tone that implies of an answer given one too many times. “ Best friends and nothing more.”

 

But as the years go by, Jin Kang isn’t so sure of that anymore.

 

“ Let’s go home,” Seonho said, waiting for her by her desk. The sun filters through his tousled brown hair, and he nudges Jinkang playfully. “ Come on now, slowpoke.”

 

“ Yeah, yeah.” Jin Kang answered, and the butterflies flutter in her stomach when he grins at her. “ Let’s go home.”

 

( Jin Kang wonders if Seonho feels the butterflies in his stomach, too)

 

*******

 

Jin Gook watched as his Jin Kang grow into a fully-bloomed sunflower, watched as she cried and laughed, and watched helplessly as she falls in love.

 

It was inevitable, Jin Gook knew, even though he would rather keep her by his side forever. He just didn’t know whom exactly she would fall in love with until she introduces him to her best friend for the first time, a tall boy who came over to their house for a science project.

 

“ Hello,” The boy greeted politely, as Jin Gook scrutinizes him cautiously. “ My name is Kang Seonho, and I’m Jin Kang’s best friend.”

 

All pretense falls from Jin Gook’s face, and his grip in their shared handshake loosen. It was a name that called out to him with haunting whispers through the distance of years, the birth name of the man with a photographic memory and mirthless laugh. Kang Seonho looked nothing like Moo-young, yet he was everything like him. Jin Gook could see the remnants of him in the boy’s unwavering gaze and a too calm smile that sets him on edge. 

 

“ Dad? Dad? Are you okay?” His sweet Jin Kang asked, her wide eyes filled with concern as Seonho steps back, shuffling awkwardly. “ You look very pale.”

 

“ I’m sorry, I’m not feeling very well today,” Jin Gook answered, lying through his teeth. Then he excuses himself, shuts his bedroom door behind him and muffles his screams into his pillow.

 

“ He is not Kim Moo-young,” So-jung assured, pulling Jin Gook into her embrace as he buries his face into her neck and cries. “ He is the son of a convenience store owner, not the son of a murderer.”

 

“ He is my best friend!” Jin Kang screamed, when Jin Gook had tried to forbid her from hanging out with Seonho. It was a dark time he doesn’t want to remember, an action he committed out of impulse and personal gain. “ Why won’t you just let me be?”

 

 _Because he’s going to take you away from me again,_ Jin Gook wanted to scream back, _just like he did so many years ago._

 

But Jin Kang does not listen, and So-jung takes her side. In the end, Jin Gook is forced to look on as Jin Kang and Seonho’s playful jostling changes into gentle touches and their loud chatter turns into sweet whispers. Jin Gook’s heart warms at seeing his Jin Kang so happy, but it also shatters, because Seonho loves her too.

 

Jin Gook feigns ignorance, but he sees everything. He notices the fond, adoring smiles Seon-ho reserves only for Jin Kang, the subconscious mimicking of body language when he listens to her speak. He opened the hand-written letter Seonho wrote to Jin Kang on her 17th birthday- an invasion of privacy that gnaws at Jin Gook’s conscience still- and despite hoping against hope that Seonho might not love her, that it is only infatuation or even a pretentious front, Jin Gook could feel Seonho's heartfelt emotions poured into ink on paper.

 

Jin Gook has lost, and he does not attempt to fight any longer. If they didn’t give up on each other then, they would not give up on each other now.

 

Months fade into years, and the day comes when Seon-ho approaches Jin Gook and Sojung to ask for Jin Kang’s hand. It didn’t take long for Sojung to agree- she was fond of the boy, he knew- but when Seonho turned his eyes on him, burning with fervency and hope, Jin Gook found himself at lost for words.

 

“ If you promise to love her and her only, if you can put her happiness before yours,” Jin Gook finally said, “ Then, yes.”

 

The smile that broke on Seonho’s face was so bright and genuine; Jin Gook couldn’t help but smile back.

 

(How could he say no? Seonho is Jin Kang’s happiness.)

 

In the blink of an eye, an engagement ring sits snugly on Jin Kang’s finger. Jin Gook sees it wink at him at the corner of his vision, and he doesn’t know whether to laugh or to cry.

 

“ Do you remember the first time we spoke to each other?” Jin Gook overheard Seonho saying to Jin Kang once, in the soft voice of a lover. “ It might sound cheesy, but it somehow felt like we knew each other for a very long time.”

 

 _You did,_ Jin Gook wants to say, but he only turns around, a bitter smile on his lips.

 

It is on their wedding day that Jin Gook watches from the pews, his fingers interlaced tightly with Sojung’s as they witness Jin Kang and Seoho recite their vows. Even through the mist of his tears, Jin Gook could see their love shining in their eyes. It was as clear as the light of a hundred million stars.

 

 _Please don’t feel sorry for me anymore, ahjussi,_ Moo-young’s letter said; he had signed it off as Kang Seonho, and it remains still in the deepest confines of Jin Gook’s desk, left untouched but not forgotten. _25 years is enough._

 

_It has been more than 25 years_ , Jin Gook thought, as he lets the tears flow liberally down his face. _And with your happiness, my debt is repaid._

 

_(I am finally set free)_

 

 

 

**\- end-**

**Author's Note:**

> Not sure if anyone will ever read this, but I hoped you enjoyed this and made your day better bc the ending made me Sad for days on end.


End file.
